A lot has happened in the past 12 months. Probably more than I can remember, and probably more than you'd care to know. But I'll try to keep it simple and i'll try to keep it entertaining, but I warn you not to read this unless you have a little time.
Let me just start off by saying I had one of the most amazing winters in Florida that i've ever experienced. For those of you who know me well, you'll know that i'm not exclusively talking about how amazing my horses were or how great the weather was, but more to degree of the collectables I gathered along the way in terms of family and friends. I hate to say I was "blessed", but it sort of turns out that that may be the only word to describe the way i feel about the people I was lucky enough to live with this year. I moved in with my truly awesome boyfriend (scary, i know :) ), and two other girls, Ashlyn and Dana. Our personalities immediately bonded and our casual (!) drinking similarities were instantly noted. It's a great feeling when people you've just met really feel like old friends or old souls, or people who you've just felt like you've know you're whole life. We quickly became a close knit family sharing things best friends would only share, and fighting about things only family members would :) I'm so very glad for the friendships that were created this year, and the fun we were so lucky enough to share (over and over and over!) and the feeling of calm that was created by the support that only a family can give. I love all of you guys and don't ever forget that!
On a more horse related topic, this year was one of extreme happiness and the polar opposite. As most of you were aware, i spent all last winter rehabbing my favorite horse, Minstral to soundness in hopes to compete him at the highest level of eventing this year. Things started off smoothly with a great month of preparation in January of 2011. It was a great feeling to see our name on the entry status at Rocking Horse horse trials for the January event. We had a stellar weekend having personal bests in all three phases…pretty awesome seeing we hadn’t been out together in two years! It wasn’t until I got home that evening from the event where I realized Danny wasn’t ok. You know, that voice in the back of your head. The one you want to tell to shut up, go away, come back another day? The one that’s always right. The one that makes you feel sick to your stomach because you know the facts are correct. That voice never lies and this was no exception. I just knew that Danny had re-injured himself on the same leg where I spent 18 months ever so carefully nursing it back to full strength. It was like I was lost. I couldn’t feel my body. I couldn’t even cry because I was waiting to wake up on another day where this wasn’t happening. The next day I had an ultra sound done on Dan. I could see clearly where there was a new lesion above and below the old one. Apparently it’s quite common for this kind of injury to occur after stem cell is done on a suspensory ligament. The fibers surrounding the original injury have to work extra hard and sometimes stretch too much and aren’t strong enough to hold together. I’ve never broken down like that before. There I was standing beside my best friend 100 percent sure that I would never ever be able to compete him at the Advanced level again. For all of you who have a dream, and all of you I know you do… There’s absolutely no worse feeling than that of being slapped in the face with the cold reality of a dream you have to let go. I’m not going to lie. I was in a bad place in my head for a while. Not only did my horse just injure himself, and a lot of dreams were forced to be placed elsewhere, but my little horse Smarty Pants had a very mild case of pneumonia. He had to be on a severe and strict schedule of antibiotics for a week, but fortunately came out of it fine. He took a few weeks to recover fully, but I eventually got him back into full work so we could event at the end of February.
I never had a real respect for Valentine’s day, probably because of the fact that I was most likely dating an asshole, fighting with one, or didn’t have an asshole to fight with at all. But this Valentine’s was different. Still having a fresh wound from Danny, I wasn’t really back to myself yet and all my house mates were great in the fact that they gave me my space and didn’t ask too many questions, mostly in fear that they would make me cry or have to listen to my tear filled mumbles… but at the end of the day on Feb 14th I received the most special Valentine’s gift in the history of Valentine’s gifts. As a lead up, I’ll let you know that I’m dating one of the most sincere, respectful, loving, understanding and genuine human beings in the world. His name is Christian Bennett and every day I wake up I can’t help but think how lucky I am to have met him. So, here I am opening my gift. It was an odd shape, clearly a collage of multiple photos from the back? Yep. I turn it around only to find my most favorite photographs of Danny and I from all the competitions we completed together. Let me also tell you that I’m not a “cryer” but this hit something inside that I couldn’t hold in. This was so much better than chocolate. And much better than flowers. Flowers die, and chocolate tastes good for the moment, but always makes you feel guilty too soon afterward. But this, it was perfect. I could look at it every day and smile. And cry. But most of all, feel proud of what we’d accomplished. Every time I looked at it on our bedroom wall reminded me not to be sad of what was lost, but helped me realize how far Danny has helped me come. It was the most special present and I thank you for that Christian. And I thank you for putting the feeling back into Valentine’s day J
Two weekends ago I was in New Jersey competing at Jersey Fresh CCI** on my sweet ass horse, Smarty Pants. This was his second ** and our dressage went pretty awesome! Despite some conflicts with judging and such (you can get caught up on www.eventingnation.com ) I carried on into cross country day. You know those jumps on course that you have in your head that you say “phew! Glad that one is over” and then you carry on without a doubt for the rest of the course?? Well the dock in the water at 6a was that one for me! Unfortunately I didn’t get to the part of “phew, made it!” it was more like “SHIT, I’m getting wet”. Yep, Gavin decided that this water was a little early on course and the adrenaline hadn’t quite kicked in yet. He took a good gander at it and ballooned 22 feet (ok it was probably only 4 feet) over it landing completely still on the other side. You know what happens when you’re on a horse and the forward motion completely stops? You keep going. And I sure did as I cart wheeled through the air and did a lovely dive for Canada into the Jersey Shore water complex only spicing things up by landing of my feet. YES! Perfect 10! As I was trying to get myself and Gavin out of the water to clear the course, I noticed my right foot wasn’t working so well. So, I resorted to infant style and crawled out of the water jump. Hawley Bennett and Christian were the two behind me so I HAD to clear the course as quickly as possible. I didn’t want to be the one responsible for a hold on course!! As the medics helped me off course and into the ambulance, I was worried about who had caught my horse and where the hell he was. Thankfully, my mom , who after hearing that someone needed to get Smarty Pants, sprinted effortlessly like she was in the 100 meter dash at the Olympics, and came to Smarty Pants’ rescue. My mom surely was scared wondering what had happened to me as I couldn’t take him back to the barn myself. I honestly don’t know how my parents watch me do this crazy sport. But it never fails. Both my Mom and Dad come to every event. And they’ve come to every event ever since I started riding. The only time they don’t make it is when I’m competing in Florida at regular horse trials. They’re always there, always have been and I hope they always will. It doesn’t matter how I do, I can always count on them to say something productive. I look forward to hearing “have fun” from my mom as I head to the start box and the recaps of how “smooth” my ride was from my dad. They have complete faith in my riding abilities and the horses I have, and without them none of my success or happiness would have happened. It’s really a great feeling to have such a support team and for that to be my mom and dad. They’ve always been involved in everything me and my sisters have taken an interest in. Not once have they ever said I couldn’t do something, even when things may not be going that great at the time! If I’ve learned one thing from my parents it’s that you can’t get anywhere without hard work and dedication but you’ve also got to be realistic about things and not everything that you want to happen, can. One of my favorite parts about the big shows or three day events is that I get to see my Mom and Dad! I love you guys so much and I hope to see you at all the upcoming events. Thanks for everything, really J
I’d also like to send a big shout out to Christian for finishing his first CCI** at Jersey fresh in fine fresh form, which in turn qualified him for YR’s this summer!!! Sawwwweeeeet!
And anyone else competing, getting married, moving out, starting over, starting fresh, keeping on, or just smiling, best of luck to you, and best of luck to your future.
Today is the day to get it right.
See you soon,
Kelly
